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Lifeline on 13 11 14 or beyondblue on 1300 224 636. In an emergency, call 000.

I've always had anxiety but I didn't always have depression. I always felt really anxious in the world but pretty happy in myself, and depression was learnt. The outcome of it is just the belief of I don't belong in this world and I don't want to be in this world.

Since I was almost a baby I just had like an immense amount of anxiety.

I would pick at my skin, would pull out my hair and was self-harming from the age of four and mum just knew that there was something not quite right.

My name is Elise Muller. I am an indigenous female athlete from Wiradjuri and Palawa country and we are in the Essendon football grounds, which is my football club.

It's been a very tough time and… and the world around me was really, really loud, and it hurt. Lights were too bright, sounds of things was too loud, it was just really overwhelming.

When I got to about 12 years old, I was diagnosed with autism and that, um, explained why the world was so loud and so overwhelming for me.

With my anxiety there've been times where I've not wanted to leave the house. If you're bullied enough or you're told by teachers you can't enough, you start to believe in it. I just wanted to be normal. I just wanted to have friends so the things that I needed to do I couldn't just stop doing I need to find a way to mask it.

Everyone's got baggage and you can't carry all that weight on you.

Disability and mental health are quite linked it's a really lonely space to be in, in the sense of they've looked at it at a competence lens. At the end of the day, we're born with the same amount of worth. I want to save lives because the suicide statistics for people with autism is just sad and I've been there, I've been in that place.

It's all about education but people being open to having those conversations. If you start giving people with mental health and anxiety and depression a voice and empowering, all of a sudden we're being heard and we’re not actually feeling that alone because depression is feeling alone, anxiety is being too scared to put yourself to be part of it, and if you start giving the voice and then acknowledging it, we're actually taking away the … the most harmful parts of that. You know mental health is a disability, it's an illness it's … it's um crippling.

If you're sitting there on your bed with the lights down, with the door shut and you’re shut away from the world just know that whether you're scrunched up or faded you have worth and you have a voice and you’re worth listening to, you know, you're worthy of the microphone.

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05 March 2020
Duration: 3:10
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Elise Muller was diagnosed with autism at the age of 12 and was told from a very young age about all the things she couldn’t do. 

But she refused to take no for an answer and ended up playing Australian Rules football at an elite level for Essendon. 

Elise is passionate about the role of sport in mental health and founded her own organisation to support people with autism wanting to get involved in recreational activities. 

If you or someone you know needs support, call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or beyondblue on 1300 224 636. In an emergency, call 000.

 

If you or someone you know needs support, call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or beyondblue on 1300 224 636. In an emergency, call 000.

I've always had anxiety but I didn't always have depression. I always felt really anxious in the world but pretty happy in myself, and depression was learnt. The outcome of it is just the belief of I don't belong in this world and I don't want to be in this world.

Since I was almost a baby I just had like an immense amount of anxiety.

I would pick at my skin, would pull out my hair and was self-harming from the age of four and mum just knew that there was something not quite right.

My name is Elise Muller. I am an indigenous female athlete from Wiradjuri and Palawa country and we are in the Essendon football grounds, which is my football club.

It's been a very tough time and… and the world around me was really, really loud, and it hurt. Lights were too bright, sounds of things was too loud, it was just really overwhelming.

When I got to about 12 years old, I was diagnosed with autism and that, um, explained why the world was so loud and so overwhelming for me.

With my anxiety there've been times where I've not wanted to leave the house. If you're bullied enough or you're told by teachers you can't enough, you start to believe in it. I just wanted to be normal. I just wanted to have friends so the things that I needed to do I couldn't just stop doing I need to find a way to mask it.

Everyone's got baggage and you can't carry all that weight on you.

Disability and mental health are quite linked it's a really lonely space to be in, in the sense of they've looked at it at a competence lens. At the end of the day, we're born with the same amount of worth. I want to save lives because the suicide statistics for people with autism is just sad and I've been there, I've been in that place.

It's all about education but people being open to having those conversations. If you start giving people with mental health and anxiety and depression a voice and empowering, all of a sudden we're being heard and we’re not actually feeling that alone because depression is feeling alone, anxiety is being too scared to put yourself to be part of it, and if you start giving the voice and then acknowledging it, we're actually taking away the … the most harmful parts of that. You know mental health is a disability, it's an illness it's … it's um crippling.

If you're sitting there on your bed with the lights down, with the door shut and you’re shut away from the world just know that whether you're scrunched up or faded you have worth and you have a voice and you’re worth listening to, you know, you're worthy of the microphone.

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